"Please God Help Me!"

I want to share with you a short story. It was a little over 14 years ago when I was at one of the darkest places in my life. I was strung out on drugs, homeless crashing at my aunt’s house, and in violation of my probation. My first daughter had just turned a year old. I sent her to live with father’s parents. I was so depressed and sick. I didn’t know what else to do. I believed that Jesus was real and that He would help me if I prayed and cried out to Him. So I did.

I will never forget that night and the series of events that happened from then on. I was lying on the top bunk of my cousin’s bed crying, “Please God help me! I am tired of all of this. I need your help! I want my daughter back. I want my family back. Please God help me!” I cried myself to sleep that night. The next morning I went ahead living my dysfunctional life. I went off to work and on my lunch break I got high and ended up committing a crime. I was arrested for not only that charge but for violation of probation. I knew that I was facing a prison sentence. I was scared, but I also had a sense of relief. No more running. No more hiding. Finally!! All of sudden I remembered my prayer from the previous night. “God this is your idea of answering my prayer? Ok??”

Our Lord in His mercy and grace gave me favor once again with the judge. After three months in jail I was sentenced to a drug rehabilitation center as an alternative to prison. If I completed this six month program my probation would be reinstated and I could move on with my life. But I was still so full of rebellion. I ended breaking the rules and violating my stay. Back to jail I went to await sentencing. This would be the third time that I would violate and the judge promised me that if I messed up again that I would be sentenced to prison for sure. That’s exactly what happened. I was sentenced to five years in the Florida State Prison.

Seems like a terrible story huh? Well it isn’t! What I didn’t share with you is that from the day that I got locked up I began drawing close to God and He drew close to me too. I got a bible and I would read and ask God to help me understand His Word. I did not know that what I was asking would result in the process of renewing my mind. I began to pray and seek Him like never before. He put a beautiful woman of God in my life, Sonia, who was not only strong in her faith but strong in personality too. He knew I needed someone like her to mentor me and speak into my life words of faith, truth, hope, and power. We meet at the rehab center where she had volunteered for an outreach event. She promised that she would write me. I did not believe her but she wrote me letters weekly from then on. She became my spiritual mother. It was through her that I first really experienced the love of Christ. She is still by my side today.

By the grace of God my five year sentenced ended up being eighteen months instead. Those eighteen months the Holy Spirit taught me the Word of God and filled me to overflowing with His Spirit. One day I received a card from my Sonia with my name and the meaning of it. Lisa comes from Elizabeth, which means consecrated to God. Consecrated means set aside, or to declare or set apart as sacred. All of a sudden I realized that the Lord allowed me to be sent to prison not only to save me from my destructive path but so that I could be set apart for Him and His purpose. Without the rest of the world and drama in my ear I could finally hear from God. My life has not been the same since. Everything that I lost and that the enemy took from me God has been restored to me in abundance. The years of pain, loneliness, and sadness have been replaced with joy, peace, and hope. Today I am surrounded by people who love me. I have undeservedly been rewarded with the blessing of several children. Our God has been faithful to build me up in Christ Jesus. I am no longer a victim of life’s circumstances. I am an over comer in Christ Jesus!

I wanted to share this with you because I believe that there is someone who has been crying out to God, “Help me God! Please help me!” and it may seem that your situation is getting worse, but it isn’t. God may not answer your prayers the way that you think He should but you cannot rely on your own understanding. His ways are so much higher than ours. His ways are so much better. You may not see it right now, but God is working in the midst of everything. Learn to walk by faith and not by sight. (Proverbs 3:5-6)

I don’t know what your situation is but as I’ve shared I had created such a mess of my life that even though He saved me the moment I believed and cried out to Him, He still needed to do some major reconstruction to my entire life from the inside out. In my rebelliousness I planted some bad seeds and I still needed to reap what I had sown and face the consequences of my actions. I could have gotten angry at God but it wasn’t His fault that I ended up in prison. It was mine. It was my own foolishness and rebelliousness that got me there. It was our Lord in His mercy and grace by the power of His Holy Spirit that gave me the strength, courage, and perseverance to endure through it all without becoming angry and bitter.

Proverbs 19:3 says, “People ruin their lives by their own foolishness and then are angry at the LORD.” There are people who get made at God when they are overwhelmed with debt but they mismanage their money and are tightfisted, scared to give their tithes and offerings. Others get mad at Him because they don’t see a breakthrough in their families but instead of speaking words of faith in their home they are speaking words of unbelief, doubt, and defeat. They are tearing apart their own homes by the words of their mouth. There comes a time where we have to accept responsibility for our disobedience, repent, and ask God to help us back onto the narrow road. We have to learn to desire God’s will more than our own.

When God is restructuring our life we cannot get angry with Him. We must remember that God is the Master Potter. He is working at His wheel. We are the jar of clay that He had a very specific plan and divine purpose for from the time that we were in our mother’s womb. However, because of our desire to have our own way and all the resistance we gave Him we messed the jar up some. So he has to start over remolding and shaping us. But this is a good thing because when God is working with a willing vessel they become one of His vessels of honor which He uses to make the riches of His glory shine through. (Jeremiah 18:1-7, Romans 9:21-23)

I want to encourage you to let go of your own plans and your own will. Become a willing vessel and trust the Lord through the remolding process. Allow Him to continue the good work that He has started. He knows what He is doing. We can trust Him with our lives. We can be sure that the end results and reward will be better than the beginning. Hold on to the verses in Isaiah 43:18-19

“But forget all that—it is nothing compared to what I am going to do. For I am about to do something new. See, I have already begun! Do you not see it? I will make a pathway through the wilderness. I will create rivers in the dry wasteland.”

You cried out, “God Help Me!” now it’s time that you let Him help you HIS WAY, NOT YOUR WAY! Obey and trust Him you will not be sorry.

A Test Of Faith-Carrie Prejean

Crosspost from www.WeUsed2bu.com

Written By Beloved By Him

The Miss USA pageant was in its final event as Carrie Prejean, Miss California 2009, faced the judges and prepared herself for her question on Saturday night. But did she have any idea that she was actually entering into a spiritual battle of great significance? The judge who presented the question, Perez Hilton, asked her if she thought that all the United States should follow Vermont’s example and legalize homosexual marriage. In response, while she did say that she was proud to live in a country that supported freedom of choice, she went on to assert that she believes that marriage should be between a man and woman, and that was the standard by which she was raised. The crowd roared, whether in support or disagreement, and Carrie, who seemed to be the front-runner, lost the competition and became first runner-up, partially due to the fact that Hilton apparently gave her a score of “zero” for her response. Hilton later went on to his weblog and, in an outrageous example of disrespect, called her by an obscene name and ranted against her personally. She was also criticized by people from both the Miss USA and Miss California pageants for not being supportive of gay marriage. Without question, Carrie paid a price for taking a stand for the righteousness of God.

Carrie will get much more than she paid for, however. Not just the negativity and criticism from those who hate God’s ways. Besides the outpouring of support from others who share her beliefs, and the opportunity to speak to various media sources and continue to talk about her faith, Carrie has also invested in the kingdom of God, which the Bible likens to a pearl of great price. Matthew 13 explains how her sacrifice is ultimately her reward:

“Again, the kingdom of heaven is like treasure hidden in a field, which a man found and hid, and for joy over it he goes and sells all that he has and buys that field. Again, the kingdom of heaven is like a merchant seeking beautiful pearls, who, when he had found one pearl of great price, went and sold all that he had and bought it.” (Matt. 13:44-46)

Carrie shared with Fox news that she believed that the Lord was testing her character and her faith. In her heart, Carrie knew that there was nothing, no title, no earthly crown, that could ever compare to her Lord and her place in His kingdom. She could have sold out her beliefs and given a more politically correct answer, and maybe she would have gone on to win. But as she told Matt Lauer on the Today show the following Tuesday morning, then she wouldn’t be there with him. She knows that she has been given an opportunity by her testimony to show that God, and her faith in Him, is more important to her than anything she might temporarily gain here on earth.

On a platform that was viewed by millions of people, Carrie Prejean showed the world an example of a woman who is beautiful not just because she is pretty and poised, but because she is strong and fearless, gentle and wise. She may be attacked by those who would see God’s laws trampled underfoot, but their words will not stand—His will. Instead, because of God’s faithfulness to use for good what the enemy means for harm, Carrie and her testimony are like the kingdom she represents—a priceless pearl.

“All flesh is grass, and all its loveliness is like the flower of the field. The grass withers, the flower fades, because the breath of the Lord blows upon it; surely the people are grass. The grass withers, the flower fades, but the word of our God stands forever.” (Is. 40:6-8)

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Beloved By Him

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My Testimony for Out of the Miry Clay

I had to write a short testimony for Out of the Miry Clay Ministries and I figured I'd share it with you.

Growing up I always believed that there was a God out there and I believed that He was Jesus but I did not truly believe that He cared about the details of my life. I did not believe that He was there for me. I felt that he did not care about the troubles in my life and in my family. I was deceived by the enemy of our soul for many years. He blinded my eyes so that I could not see the wonderful things that God had planned for me. Out of my own selfishness and desire to have my own way and control my own life I resisted God’s love. I was so lost and misguided by foolishness. I followed all the wrong people down a destructive path. (2 Corinthians 4:4, James 2:14-15, Matthew 7:13-14)

Perhaps it was the death of my mother when I was sixteen or the multiple molestations within the family that caused my heart to harden. I did not know how to love and it was even harder to receive love. From a young teenager I was in and out of jail. I don’t remember ever being scared. I was full of anger, wrath, and bitterness. I loved partying and wild parties. I loved the darkness. I did not care who I hurt or the negative influence that I was having on my younger brother and sister. By the time I was sixteen I caught a drug trafficking charge. I was given five years probation. What a mistake. I violated that probation three times before they finally got tired of my rebellious nature and decided to send me to prison to finish up my sentence. (Galatians 5:19-21)

By this time I had a small child, a gift of God that I did not deserve and I did not truly value. I was just twenty years old on my way to prison, but God had a plan. What the enemy meant to destroy me the Lord turned around for my good and for His glory. He had not forgotten me and left me alone in the mess that I had made out of my life. (Genesis 50:20, Hebrews 13:5-6)

By the time I was sentenced to prison I had surrendered my life to the Lord. I realized that I had made a mess of my life. My will and my way of doing things resulted in chaos and destruction. I decided that I would put my life in the hands of the One who watched me as I was being formed in utter seclusion, as I was woven together in the dark of my mother’s womb. He saw me before I was born and every day of my life was recorded in His book. He protected me even when I was in rebellion and did not allow me to be utterly destroyed. (Psalm 139:13-16)

I learned that He has always had precious thoughts about me. His Word showed me that His thoughts about me are so many that they cannot even be numbered. They can’t be counted. They even outnumber the grains of sand! Even when I am sleeping He is thinking about me and He is still with me when I awake! Amazing!! He had always had wonderful plans for me, to prosper me and give me a future and hope in Christ Jesus. If I would only cry out to Him and seek Him with all of my heart. That is exactly what I did and now I am leaving a legacy and inheritance for my descendants. My children are now a heritage of the Lord. Generations are changed because I chose life in Christ Jesus instead of life committed to myself, the world, and sin. (Psalm 139: 17-18, Jeremiah 29:11-13, Psalm 127:3)

Today I am blessed and highly favored of God. He has restored everything that was lost in the years of my disobedience. He has blessed me with seven beautiful children, five of which I had the privilege of birthing. I have a husband who loves me and is committed to God and our family. I serve the Lord full time with all of my heart. God is no respecter of persons. What He has done for me He will do for you. I waited patiently for the LORD to help me, and he turned to me and heard my cry. He lifted me out of the pit of despair, out of the mud and the mire. He set my feet on solid ground and steadied me as I walked along. He has given me a new song to sing, a hymn of praise to our God. Many will see what he has done and be amazed. They will put their trust in the LORD. (Joel 2:25, Psalm 40:1-3)

A WeUsed2bu Woman's Testimony-Melissa's Story

Continued from "A Soul is Saved! Rejoice!"

A WeUsed2bu Woman's Testimony: Melissa's Story

My New Year's Resolution was for me to do whatever it took to be closer to God this year. The other day I went from searching different websites to being saved last night. For some reason God brought me to your website and gave me the strength to take me out of my comfort zone and contact you. I am so blessed that he did.

I am truly blessed and grateful for you (Lisa) walking up there with me and sharing that moment with me. I admire the both of you and what you guys are doing. I was raised in a Catholic home. Although, I never understood his word I always believed in God. He has truly been my Savior throughout the years.

At 18 my father shot and killed my mother and then pulled the gun on himself. At 19 I was in an abusive relationship with a drug addict. I was beat pretty much every other day. I used to cry to God and ask why was He putting me in this type of a situation when I had lost my parents? I felt hopeless. I went from having everything to losing everything, to losing everything including my dignity.

What I didn't realize is that I had him. God was always there. For some reason I had to go thru what I went thru to become the strong woman I am today. God didn't make my life easier He made me stronger! He gave me the strength to leave that relationship in the middle of the night with 2 bags to my name and never look back. It wasn't easy having no one to turn to but Him.

I went from living house to house and having my closet in the trunk of my car. I saved up enough money and purchased my first home at the age of 21. I worked all day and went to school every night. He gave me the strength to get up every morning and accomplish everything I have. I have everything because of Him. I am truly blessed that I had Him there every step of the way. He never left me. He was next to me the whole entire time. I could have strayed but He kept me moving forward.

With everything He has given me I hadn't thanked Him until yesterday. I know in my heart I was destined to meet you guys. I want to thank you so much Lisa for giving me that courage to walk up there last night and be saved and to finally say thank you from the bottom of my heart to God. For I have everything now. I am grateful that Jesus has brought you to me. If this website was to touch one woman, well then the job has been accomplished. Thank you so much ladies! I hope we stay in contact. Keep up the good work! May God bless the both of and your families.

Love Always,
Your new sister
Melissa

A Story of A Champion

Let me introduce you to my brother in law and brother in the Lord. He is living proof that our God is still in the business of doing miracles. After a 15 year drug addiction he has been delivered by God and is now completely sold out to Jesus. He is a JESUS FREAK!! I asked him to share his story and his experience from this weekend. I give you Mike Colon.. A story of a champion.

My name is Mike Colon and I am 30 years of age. This weekend I was blessed to have an opportunity to go into the prisons with the Bill Glass Prison Ministry WOC. Before I explain the awesome experience I had I figured I should give my testimony so you can understand just how big our God is.

My early childhood was pretty normal, grew up in a family with parents, an older brother, and a younger brother. We had a typical American Puerto Rican family. We lived in a nice home, had family vacations and grew up very close to our extended family. I was always a model student, played lots of sports and was actively involved in music in school. When I was going into the 8th grade we moved from New Jersey to Hollywood, FL and the transition really started my downward spiral. Within just a couple months of moving to Florida I was hanging with the wrong crowd, skipping school and started smoking marijuana. It was in my freshman year of high school when I just started living for the flesh.

My days started and ended with drugs, I was always late to class, grades fell and the things that were once important in my life didn’t matter anymore. It’s to no surprise that soon enough marijuana was not enough. My school was in a very “upper-class” neighborhood but that just meant drugs were easier to find. I started doing a lot of LSD and cocaine. By the time I was a junior I had gotten arrested several times and had gotten one of my girlfriends pregnant. I dropped out of high school in my senior year with 2 children and started selling drugs. I was seeking every possible fleshy way of filling the void that was empty this whole time.

From this point on in my life I was a “functioning” drug addict… I always had good jobs and even got my GED and was in college for pre-med/nursing. It wasn’t until recently that I realized even though I denied God as a young adult (I even went as far as considering myself agnostic) God always protected me. I continued on this path of destruction, always justifying my actions because I had a job and a family. In the years to follow I dropped out of college and continued living crazy. In that time I met my wife… about 8 years ago.

Our lifestyles were identical. We partied and did drugs routinely; I was a terrible boyfriend and a bad father. We had 2 beautiful daughters that I never appreciated until recently. And before I realized it I found myself deeply addicted to oxycontin and other pain killers.

In early December 2007, my older brother and his wife basically did an intervention on me and I went to a detox facility. Before entering the detox center, I was given a book called “Lose That Man and Let Him Go” by Bishop TD Jakes. This was the beginning of the end of my previous life. On my detox bed I prayed to God and asked him to help me change my life and I promised that if He did this I would dedicate my life to the Gospel.

Well, here I am! I accepted Jesus as my Lord and Savior on December 19, 2007 at Calvary Chapel Ft.Lauderdale and have never looked back. The addictions, the strongholds and the person I had been were instantly and miraculously gone. Our God, the Ultimate Redeemer, changed what many thought was the unchangeable… ME.

Since being born again, I’ve married my loving wife. God’s miracles didn’t just stop at me; they also impacted my wife… The change God has done in her life is just a whole other story. I’ve redeemed my relationship with my kids and I have dedicated my life to the Gospel. I am now actively involved in my Church and various ministries including the prison ministry event this past weekend.

I have to start by saying this weekend was AWESOME. I kinda expected to have a blessed weekend doing Kingdom work but never expected to be this fulfilled. This was my very first prison ministry event and I was really concerned that I wasn’t going to be ready. After praying over and over, God comforted me and explained that I didn’t need to be “prepared” I just needed to trust God and He would do the rest. Talk about a “conduit”. I truly felt God’s presence in the prison and I knew the words I spoke were the words of our heavenly Father. This experience was confirmation to me that God has a bigger plan for me and I could almost relate to the joy the Apostles must have felt leading people to know Jesus.

There were several incredible experiences I had this weekend doing Gods work but my best experience was at Dade Correctional Facility. After the guest speaker concluded his testimony he asked the inmates to take a look around to see the volunteers who were there to help talk to them about God. I noticed an inmate acting very “hardcore” just a couple feet in front of me (I mean what can we expect of these guys, they are in prison). But when he began looking around we caught eyes and to my surprise, standing in front of me was one of my best friends from middle and high school. When we caught eyes, immediately the “hardcore” image disappeared and in front of me was a very lost, broken individual, screaming for help. At this point I knew why God sent me to that particular prison, we talked for a little while and he proceeded to tell me he needed to change and he knew by my very presence that Jesus was the way. He pretty much said, “If God can change you, I know he can change me.” My heart screamed “THANK YOU JESUS!” and I was privileged to lead my once very carnal best friend to the love of our Almighty Savior, Jesus! Seeing my old friend and leading him to the Lord was incredible and took the cake!

This weekend helped me realize that we are all ministers in the Body of Christ and we are called to spread the Good News. I was able to lead a total of 16-18 once lost men to Christ this weekend and I am confident God will help them change. One of the guest speakers said this weekend we “increased the enrollment in Heaven and decreased the enrollment in hell.” The Bible says angels in heaven rejoice when just one sinner repents. Could you imagine the party in heaven this weekend… Hallelujah and thank you Jesus for this ministry. It has changed me!

Day 1 WOC Pt2 First Public Confession

Continued from Day 1 WOC "By The Word of Their Testimony

After lunch it’s back to the same pods we go so that we can fellowship with the girls. During our lunch break I was asked to be a platform speaker for the second half of the day. I was to go from pod to pod sharing my story. I have done these events quite a few times and I have been asked before to be a platform speaker, but this time was different I did not know why at the time. The Holy Spirit had been telling me to prepare my heart to speak since that morning so I was not surprised when I was asked to share. I asked our Lord to give me the Words that He would have me speak.

I went into the first pod and began to share my story in front of close to 100 women. I told them how I had been raised by both my father and mother until I was eleven years old when they separated. It was all down hill for me then. I became even more rebellious and started running away from home. I went to live with my dad because I was closer to him at the time. My mother was very strict with me and we just always seemed to bump heads. I explained that I realize today that she was just trying to protect me.

Full of stubbornness and rebellion I thought I knew everything and I wanted to be so grown. I had run away twice to New York before the age of 14. My family had formed a gang and pretty much joined forces with another big gang in our county. They were one of these largest gangs in Broward County in the early 90’s. Most of my family only helped feed the terrible demons that possessed my life.

I began doing drugs, fighting, having sex, stealing, clubbing, hanging out all night and disappearing for days at a time. I had been arrested a couple of times and did a little time in juvenile detention. Then I was sixteen when my mother died in a tragic car accident. This pushed me over the edge. Now I was full of rage and hurt. The one emotion that I had the most that ate at my heart was regret. I regretted not being able to be the daughter that my mother deserved. I just wanted to know that she loved me. What I shared next surprised me…

I continued on to tell them that perhaps I had been angry with my mother because when I was small child I told her of how I had been molested by a family member that was staying in our home. When I told her what occurred she addressed the individual along with their parent, but they did not believe me. I remember being slapped in the face and being called a liar. I was wounded forever. This was not the first or the last time that this would occur, not by the same family member. Others too had their way with me.

I stood for a moment before the women in disbelief but in freedom. I told them that this was the first time that I shared publicly that I had been molested. I gave glory to God who has healed me and explained that it is by His Spirit that I am able to forgive and share that story with them. Although I do not forget what has happened I remember with forgiveness. When I looked around and saw the tears and the shock in their faces I immediately knew that many of these women had also been molested or raped. My friend read me a statistic from the Us Department of Justice’s site that said more than 50% of the women in jail said they had been physically or sexually abused in the past. How awful. L

I finished sharing and went on to the next dorm to tell my story of deliverance. That day approximately 200 women heard how our Lord delivered me from darkness and brought me into the light. When I was done sharing I felt like the little girl that hides inside me was no longer full of shame and guilt. She was full of love and freedom in Christ Jesus. She has learned to allow our Lord to take what the enemy meant to destroy her and use it for His glory.

After leaving the prisons we went to a banquet that was hosted by a local church for all of the volunteers. We had dinner, fellowship, and shared our experiences in the jails and prisons. There was singing, laughing, and prayer. It was an awesome end to a glorious day.

Enclosing I would like to say that if you have been molested or raped you do not have to be ashamed or feel guilty. You were the victim but you do not have to remain the victim. You can become the victor through Christ Jesus. He can heal you if you will choose to forgive your offender. It took me many years to even face this situation, to even talk about it. It was just a couple of months ago that I told my husband, whom I have been with for ten years, that I was molested as a child.

Our God was patient with me and knew when I would be ready to face this. One of my mother’s in the Lord shared her story with me of how her father had for years sexually abused her. She spoke with such freedom and without shame. To hear and see how our Lord had delivered and healed her made me want to face my past too. It is because of her story and His Word that fills my very being that I can address this subject today.

His Word has brought healing to my soul. His Word is freedom to those that have been held captive by strongholds, addictions, anger, and unforgiveness. Allow the Holy Spirit to heal you and to help you forgive so that you can be free too.

“The Spirit of the Lord God is upon me, because the Lord has anointed me to bring good news to the suffering and afflicted. He has sent me to comfort the brokenhearted, to announce liberty to captives and to open the eyes to the blind.” Isaiah 61:1